Nice little Lhaso Apso

Both my master and mistress are teachers. So it being the Easter Holidays, me and Jessica tend to get more walkies.
Let me explain about Jessica. She is a 10 year old Yorkshire Terrier bitch I share the house with. She is spayed and also old. There's no physical attraction between me and her....I still have my testicles so I do tend to get a tad randy now and then. A good old hump helps me loads and a bitch with a sexy tail and cute toosh certainly floats my boat. Jessica doesn't....she's old, frigid, bossy and a right madam. Still me and her are going for a walkie on Redhill Common when I catch sight of this damned sexy little LA (Lhaso Apso). Cute as a chicken strip and flirty too. Her name is Suzy and after a nice arse sniff I ask her if she fancies a quick hump.
"No way, hairy boy," she growls, "I'm seeing Dirk the German Shepherd from Winton....he's cool, well endowed and knows how to satisfy an LA."
I'm aghast.
I rebuke her with words of wisdom and articulacy:
"But Dirk is a cock. He can't chase tennis balls and he has worms...always licking his tail and arse hair."
"Insults won't affect my love for him..." she announces loudly and off she strolls, wagging her tail in a coquettishly sexy kind of way.
I decide to have a short piss against a tree and as I contemplate my isolation, my inner anguish, my total rejection, Jessica saunters up.
"You've got a tiny bit of turd stuck to your arse," she whispers.
"Yeah...you!" I reply unkindly.
She runs away and I am left gnawing at my backside trying to remove excrement and contemplating how unlucky I am in love......